It does not matter for what reason you want to interrupt communication: whether because the interlocutor did not like you, or you learned something about him that disappointed you, or because your plans and priorities have changed (you were in a romantic search, and then resumed the previous relationship), – you should not leave a person without explanation.
And not only because the world is small and you run the risk of one day come face to face with someone you left. Although just for the sake of this it would be nice to have the courage to explain.
More importantly, your failed partner does not deserve to be tormented by questions. He has the right to know what went wrong in order to turn this page, draw conclusions and move on. Finally, put yourself in his shoes: how would you feel if you were dumped without explanation?
Chances are, you send at least 20 to 50 messages a day – so take the trouble to send another one. Of course, in this case, you need to take care of the feelings of the interlocutor: he will be hurt in any case, but it is in your power to soften the blow.
What can you write to the one with whom you decide to leave
- “You know, you’re an amazing person, but I don’t have romantic feelings for you.” Simply, briefly, to the point.
- “I have thought it over thoroughly and do not see any prospects for the development of relations. But you are a wonderful person and I wish you all the best! ” A good way to indicate that you just don’t fit together.
- “I’ll be honest with you: I met someone and I want to be with this person. But I was very pleased to meet you and get to know you better. ” Honestly and sincerely.
- “I don’t want to meet again. Sorry for the false hope. ” Another way not to beat around the bush.
- “I was pleased to meet you, but we are clearly looking for a different relationship. I think we both should find someone else. ” In this case, you do not say at all that something is wrong with the person – you just are not on the way.
- “It’s very cool with you and you are a great friend for me, but, alas, no more. I will be glad to stay friends with you, but if it doesn’t suit you, I will understand too. ” Yes, sometimes it happens: we really want to continue communicating with a person, but in a friendly manner. He or she may refuse, but it’s worth a try anyway.
It is unpleasant for each of us when we are rejected, but it is especially painful when they do not even consider it necessary to explain ourselves. Don’t do this to others. Spare their feelings – and at the same time, you yourself will free yourself from the burden and fear of one day meeting someone you have left face to face.
What not to do
- Hinting that there is still hope. By saying, “I’m just not ready for a new relationship yet,” you mean that maybe in the future the person will have a chance.
- Refer to work, health conditions, or other factors beyond your control.
- Express yourself vaguely – so that the interlocutor does not even understand that you intend to interrupt communication with him.
- To speak harshly about a person is already hard for him. Don’t go into details, just write that the decision is final.