Dependencies of the strong and independent: 7 habits that prevent success
Career and self-realization
No one is perfect: everyone has their own weaknesses or habits that interfere from time to time. But real leaders can see them, recognize them, and most importantly, get rid of them. The ability to change is the destiny of the strong and successful. Here are a few mistakes you can fix to achieve more.
Count only on yourself and do not know how to ask
We are used to thinking that strong independent people should achieve everything themselves and never ask for someone’s help. However, many strong, talented and successful women in difficult or key moments of life were helped by ordinary requests. Of course, not only women seek help.
Steve Jobs in one of the interviews told how at the age of 12 he called Bill Hewlett, whose number he found in the phone book, and said: “Hello! I am Steve Jobs, I am 12 years old and I collect a frequency counter. I wanted to find out if you have any extra details that you could share with me. ” Hewlett talked with the young man for twenty minutes, and then gave not only details, but also a job at Hewlett Packard for the summer.
And, as Jobs later admitted, he repeatedly asked someone for help – and no one ever refused. And when people turned to him, he tried all his life to help them. Request is one of the most effective and universal rules of success, which we most often forget.
Not daring to seek help, we ourselves limit our possibilities. Everyone sometimes needs support, money, help with work. You can cope on your own, exhausting yourself and burning out, or you can ask – and they will almost certainly help you.
Do not know how to release the “reins”
Today, there are often top managers who are not ready to let go of control and transfer tasks to their team. And in the end, instead of “orchestrating” independent and self-sufficient professionals, they create a system in which they themselves are both financiers, sales, and eychars, and strategists, and marketers.
And their top team is highly paid performers. This model, with the suggestion of 21st-century business thinker Jim Collins, is called “Genius with a Thousand Assistants.” However, such a model does not work well and prevents your business from growing.
Jim Collins says: “If you have the right people on board, then the problem of motivation and management, in principle, disappears by itself. The right people do not need immediate guidance or incentives. They have enough self-motivation due to an internal desire to achieve exceptional results and participate in the creation of something great. ” Just entrust them to do the work for which they were hired.
Do not work on your contacts
Successful people just need to communicate with their own kind, and even better with more successful ones. After all, the principle is simple: you become those with whom you spend time. Form relationships with prominent executives. Most top managers are well aware of their colleagues in the industry from which they grew up (finance, marketing, sales), but their network of contacts does not contain other, more experienced ones from whom they could learn a lot.
If you really want to improve your performance, act like an outstanding leader. They know that almost everyone can implement through their network of contacts. Surround yourself with people who have already achieved what you would like to achieve in the future. The close relationship with them is a powerful competitive advantage and accelerator of your progress.
Can’t slow down
A lot of successful people fall into the trap of their super-efficiency: they are so used to having their whole day planned, and the calendar contains meetings and important events for six months ahead that they absolutely can’t do anything. Any time spent not on work or on important tasks is perceived as lost.
This leads to the fact that a person gradually accelerates more and more and as a result lives in a frantic rhythm. And so many people live: Elon Musk, for example, works 120 hours a week, never takes a weekend, and sometimes writes on Twitter at half past three in the night that he has just returned from the factory. And he spent his 47th birthday at work.
Psychologists are unanimous: you can’t live like that forever. Inability to slow down the frantic working rhythm sooner or later leads to burnout, a decrease in creative abilities and apathy. Living constantly at high speeds is harmful. It is important to be able to stop in order to manage to receive feedback from the world and listen to yourself.
Learning to just do nothing and, most importantly, not feel guilty for the time, seemingly wasted. Those who are incapable of this often cannot create anything truly deep.
Do not know how to recharge batteries
Many businessmen are working hard, and if you do not know how to properly recharge, you can burn out very quickly. The work of a leader is draining. You need to not only constantly think about the future of the company, but also be a model for the team, encourage employees to think outside the box, communicate with dozens of people every day, be prepared for “black swans”, that is, for unexpected, difficult to predict events.
There are five large clusters that help you recharge and have a good rest. You can spend time with family and loved ones, play sports, go for a massage, find time for reflection, and engage in spiritual and aesthetic development.
These clusters can be used both individually and in combination. All outstanding people have a system built up that helps them to be distracted from work regularly in order to fully restore their physical and emotional energy. Find your ways and don’t forget to use them.
Accustomed to the beaten path
Many people live by this principle: why give up what works? Why change what is already seemingly good? But time goes forward and requires new solutions. And the habit of acting as always acted, can even lead to the collapse of the business.
Now the world is changing at a tremendous pace, and you must be able to change with it. Business giants may lose leadership in a couple of years due to new small companies with a different vision and new technologies. That is why the task of a successful leader is to constantly keep abreast, change, improve.
Depend on success
This habit is characteristic of perfectionists: they are used to doing everything 200%, to give all the best. Often this leads to excessive self-confidence: I do everything perfectly, which means that everything will work out for me. But the problem is that it doesn’t work like that: of course, hard work pays off, but it’s very important to give yourself the opportunity to make mistakes.
The problem with perfectionists is that with any blow it is very difficult for such a person to recover: failure is so unsettling that he can become depressed. You should not identify yourself as a person with your successes. Give yourself the opportunity to be not 100% effective and sometimes make mistakes – because mistakes often help to shake oneself, change the angle of view and become even better.
Take an example from Jeff Bezos, CEO of Amazon, who, incidentally, is called one of the most successful entrepreneurs in the world. In a 2014 interview, he admitted that his mistakes cost billions of dollars. “If you want to make bold bets, you should experiment. In this case, no one knows in advance whether the experiment will succeed or you will fail. But several major successes can compensate for dozens of mistakes. ”
About the authors
Tatyana Mitrova and Yaroslav Glazunov – the authors of the new book “8 and a half steps.” Yaroslav – SEO expert, author of the best-selling book Anti-Titanic: A Guide for CEO. How to win where others drown. ” Tatyana – Director of the Energy Center of the Moscow School of Management Skolkovo.