4 types of baby temperament

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4 types of baby temperament

All children are different, and the methods of education that work with one do not affect the other. But nevertheless certain patterns are traced. In the book “Children from Heaven. The Art of Positive Education ”American psychologist John Gray identifies four types of children’s temperament and, accordingly, four approaches to communicating with children.

The main goal of John Gray’s methodology is to help parents raise a free, happy and independent member of society. And for this, the author believes, parents must learn to communicate with the child, taking into account the peculiarities of his temperament.

Each child is unique. Each possesses features, abilities, needs and interests. Parents should be aware of this and not fall into despair if their son or daughter is significantly different from the children of their friends, older brothers and sisters. In the case of education, comparison is unacceptable.

In addition, the author recommends using different approaches to the education of daughters and sons. In short, this idea can be reduced to the formula “girls care, boys trust”. Girls really need a more reverent, caring attitude. But the boys need to be trusted, providing more independence.

Having determined the type of temperament of the child, you can build more effective communication with him. But keep in mind that temperament is not always manifested in its pure form. Sometimes a mix of two or even three is possible – then the child behaves completely differently even in similar situations.

1. Sensitive

Emotionally fragile, vulnerable and sensitive personality type. Complaining is part of the nature of such a child. Sensitive children need empathy, recognition of their feelings and grievances.

Give your child the opportunity to share his burdens, and he will immediately feel better. The main mistake is to try to amuse a sensitive son or daughter. This is likely to lead to the opposite result – the child will concentrate more on the negative.

How to communicate. Such children react sharply to situations concerning their desires and needs. Often they respond with refusal with tears and at the same time they are ready to cooperate when they can be heard and understood. A sensitive child needs more attention, parents need to help him make friends among his peers.

With the support of adults, sensitive children become less self-contained, become more cheerful and active.

2. Active

Such children are most interested in the ability to influence the world around them. They strive to act and achieve results. They have the makings of leaders since birth, they love to be in the spotlight.

However, for active children you need to immediately set boundaries, otherwise they quickly go beyond the limits and resist adult decisions.

Children with such a temperament should always remember that the parent is still the main one. But in certain situations, you need to allow an active child to lead.

How to communicate. These children are positively affected by team sports under the supervision of a wise coach. It is very important not to forget to encourage the child’s desire to succeed. It is important for him to know that they believe in him, then he will show his best qualities. But such children endure inaction hard. They do not like to wait or stand in line. Therefore, during a boring lesson, it is better to immediately come up with a game or other entertainment.

Active children easily make contact when they are given an action plan: “First we go to the store. Have to be patient a little. But then we will go to the park, and you can play. ” Over time, these children become more accommodating, ready for cooperation and compromise.

4 types of baby temperament

3. Reactive

Such children are usually more sociable and friendlier than their peers. It is important for them to interact with others, they always study the reaction to their behavior. However, they are open to new sensations and emotions.

They strive to see, hear and experience as much as possible and love change. Because of this, it is sometimes difficult for a reactive child to concentrate, to bring some business to the end. They need constant stimulation and clear parental guidance.

How to communicate. The priority is a constant change of activity. Walk more with such a child to new playgrounds, museums and theaters, watch cartoons and read books. Plus: such a child is easier to switch and something to captivate. They love helping parents with new activities. It’s simple enough: “Let’s do something interesting now …” – and now the child is helping to bake cookies or vacuum clean.

It is important to remember that reactive children are very unstable, they quickly get bored. Moreover, finding a job to their liking, they often become more assiduous and disciplined.

4. Susceptible

It is important for susceptible children to understand what will happen in the next moment and what to expect from tomorrow. Predictability is important for children with this temperament.

They need time to prepare and get used to a new occupation. Therefore, in no case should you rush them or scold them for their slowness. For example, in a playground, a susceptible child enters the game only by observing it and understanding its rules.

How to communicate. Such a child needs to set tasks; rituals, daily routines and parental support in a new business are important to him. Without it, the child may not acquire any interests at all. It is difficult for him to leave the comfort zone. To encourage your child to do something, let him first observe how you do it. Explain in detail what is what and why. Such children adore detailed explanations.

No need to force a son or daughter into a common activity. This will cause a backlash and violent resistance. Although generally susceptible children are easygoing and easy to contact, they are very friendly and thoughtful. Over time, they can become more active.

About the author: John Gray is a psychologist, a specialist in the field of family relations. He is the author of 17 books on the relationship between people, including the bestselling book “Men from Mars, Women from Venus.”
Text: Nina Nabokova
Photo Source: Getty images

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